Manners

I talked to one of our teachers recently and asked if Brazilians think we are gross because we eat with our hands. The English word "gross" sounds like the Portuguese word "grosseiro" which means "unmannered" so he understood what I was asking. He assured me that it wasn't counted against us that we eat with our hands. Brazilians don't tend to do it, but it's cool that other people do.  He then suggested that it is the directness with which we speak that is considered grosseiro. He asked what I thought of the sentence, "Do you want to stop by later?" I thought it sounded good and this proved his point. Asking if someone wants something puts them in the awkward position of saying they don't want the thing, which is rude, or in the awkward position of saying that they do want something, which is a little too direct. Complicated, right? He suggested using, "could it be that..." instead. Now that we understand, we are going to work on asking our questions in a less grosseiro way.